A Single Girl’s Guide To A Sick Day

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Current nest situation.

Woke up this morning with a pounding headache, a throat on fire and a heavy chest. I don’t have the luxury of calling a boy to bring me hot lemon, honey and gingers, so, bae’s gotta take care of herself (I’m not whinging about being single, what? Why would you think that? #foreveralone).

I’m actually really bad at sick days because I’m terrible at sitting still and doing nothing, but somehow I have made it to 2pm without trying to work out/do a painting/go to the shops/clean the house (OK, I cleaned a bit), so, I think this guide is legit (even though it’s literally just a running commentary of my day so far)

1. Sleep in. As late as possible. In a big nest of blankets. Don’t set an alarm, just rest.
2. Get up and make loud groaning/crying noises. Say “I feel disgusting” to the empty room (so alone). Cry from the pain of trying to speak. Whhyyyyy.
3. Have a long, hot shower. Give your face a good scrub with something from Lush that smells like heaven/cake. At least your skin looks good. Shiny.
4. Layer your face and body with beautiful, nourishing moisturisers that also smell like cake. Treat yo’ self.
5. Wrap up in a comfy pair of leggings, the biggest tee you own, a warm jumper and a bonus blanket. A blanket will give you hugs and won’t get sick. Kinda a win/win.
6. Take a couple of paracetamol, many Vitamin C tablets and skull them back with at least half a litre of water, preferably more. I’m currently drinking out of a GIANT Hoegaarden glass that I found. It’s pretty great.
7. Make a delicious, creamy and cold smoothie to soothe that throat.*
8. Form a nest on the couch. Read Women’s Health. Reading about healthy people makes you healthy, right?!
9. Text everyone you know that you’re sick in case you die/one of them likes you enough to bring you treats/you get words of sympathy and love.
10. Praise the Lord that you have a best friend who will bring you treats and lemons, like for real. ❤
11. Settle back, nap and DO NOT MOVE. Except to get snacks. And chocolate. And coffee. And tea…

Do all of the above while cussing under your breath, sighing loudly and with the occasional disgruntled groan.

*Banana & Coconut Creamy Smoothie

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Blend:

1 ripe banana, sliced
2 tsp cacao & maca LSA powder
1 – 2 tsp liquid honey (or to taste)
1 – 1 & 1/2 cups unsweetened coconut mylk
1 tbs natural coconut yoghurt
1 small or 1/2 avocado

Serve:

In a giant glass over ice.

Hopefully this cure all list will work wonders and I will wake up tomorrow able to breathe and eat properly. In any case, enjoy the creamy, healthy smoothie that I created and greedily enjoyed in a moment of clarity today!

XO

PS I really hope people pick up on my sarcasm. Strong, independent woman, holaaaaa.

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